JUST THE FACTS:
Birthdate: March 2, 1963
Hails From: Martinez, CA
First Career: Modeling. "I hated every minute of it."
Best Friend: Danny Quinn, Anthony's son.
Jail Bait: When they met, Benard was 22. Wife Paula was 16.
Best GH Pal: Ron Hale
Mind Over Matter by Carolyn Hinsley
"I thought last year was good," allows GENERAL HOSPITAL's Maurice
Benard. "But I always felt like I was supporting the AIDS story. This
year, it's my own stuff to tackle. They're taking it deeper. For an
actor, the deeper you can go, the better it is."
Not always. Yes, Benard's stunning performance as tormented Sonny
Corinthos earned him a 1996 Soap Opera Digest Award and a Lead Actor
Emmy nomination (he lost to ANOTHER WORLD's Charles Keating, who plays
Carl). But nothing Benard has achieved on-screen could surpass what he
has overcome in his personal life.
"I always say, if I ever win an Emmy award, I will thank my nervous
breakdown." Is he kidding? "I'm manic depressive, so I'm chemically
imbalanced," he explains dourly. "I'm a very nervous person." He's
not kidding. And actually, he has had three breakdowns. "My first one
was when I was 22," he begins. "Right when I started acting. I lost my
mind. The cops came to my house, took me to the hospital. They asked my
mom, 'Is he a drug addict?' No. 'Is he an alcoholic?' No. 'Then he has a
virus in his brain.' Oh, okay. They gave me a brain scan and figured out
that I had had a nervous breakdown. They took me to an institution where
there were people walking around with schizophrenia. Horrible."
Benard affects an odd detachment as he tells this story, almost as if
the story isn't about him. But he's rubbing his wrists as he talks, so
the listener knows something bad is coming. "I was in the hospital
about three-and-a-half weeks,"he continues. "There were times when
they'd strap me to a bed. This I never told anyone. When I act now--when
I cry, when I saw Lily come back as a ghost--I am back in that
hospital. What happened was, I leaned back and a [watch] cut into my
wrist. It reminded me of being strapped. So, I used it. I got scared. At
one point, I told Ron [Hale, Mike], 'I'm losing it.' Ron was cool. He
said, 'Don't think about that, think about other stuff.' I was back in
the hospital for about a minute. Thats scary.'
If there is a master plan for the way our lives play out, then
Benards' horror can only be explained as a necessary ordeal to bring him
to the place he is today. "Yes," he nods. "I truly believe that if I
hadn't gone through what I've been through, there's no way I could do
what I do now. I think I could act all right, but to go that deep,
bizarre plae, to play somebody losing his mind as Sonny is, no. A friend
of mine says, 'You don't have to kill somebody to be a killer.' But I
think it's more rich than that. That scene where I broke the piano
[after Lily's death]; I've done that when my mind is screwed up. My
breakdowns have been the greatest thing for my acting."
He continues. "The first breakdown was major. Slept with people who
were crazy. They let me out for my first walk and I escaped without
tennis shoes. The cops were after me. I weighed about 129 lbs--I
weigh 169 now. I looked bad. Then, a year later, I had another breakdown
that was a religious experience. I saw God in my room. I didn't want to
tell anybody, because I was scared out of my mind. I needed to see a
priest. Paula says, 'Honey, you're losing it.' Yeah, but something was
pulling me there, It was life and death." Benard found a church, but
was turned away by a custodian. "I said,'Look, give [the priest] this,
please.' I gave him my cross, The door opens. I said, 'Hi, Father.' He
has my cross. He said, 'Come to my office. What seems to be the
problem?' I told the story. He said, 'Don't be scared.' I said, 'Has
anybody else ever told you this?' He said, 'Yeah, many times.' He gave
me back my cross. I walked out and I felt good. Paula was with me during
my second one."
There is probably nothing that could happen to the union of Paula and
Maurice Benard that could be worse than what they have already
weathered. "My first girlfriend, for my first breakdown, freaked out,"
he states matter-of-factly. "Paula's amazing." With her love (and
regular medication) Benard bounced back. He played the role of Nico
Kelly on ALL MY CHILDREN from 1987 to 1990, wed Paula, and then moved to
California, where he studied acting and auditioned for jobs he didn't
get (notably the Antonio Banderas role in Philadelphia, which went down
to the wire). And things got bad again.
"I had been out of work as an actor for two years," he relates. "I'd
been studying my ass off,auditioned, been close to something and then
heard back, 'He's too intense.' So I stopped taking my lithium, which
was the biggest mistake I made." It was around this time that GH
called, so Benard met with Executive Producer Wendy Riche, Supervising
Producer Shelley Curtis and Casting Director Mark Teschner. "Wendy and
Shelley were absolutely incredible. Mark was very cool. I hit it off
with them. They offered me Damian or Sonny. [Sonny] was a shorter-term
role, so I took Sonny. I had been taught to do bios to get into the
character, so I did. I got into Sonny. All that strict s--t, the
dialogue, I couldn't shake him. I bought a poster of Al Pacino in The
Godfather III. I had it [on my dressing room wall], but it got to the
point where it would freak me out. So I had to take it down. I had a
breakdown. The third one."
Unfortunately, Benard had stopped taking his lithium under the
mistaken impression that it would help his acting. Two weeks into his
much-needed new job at GENERAL HOSPITAL, Benard quit. "I said, 'I'm
whacked out, I'm not going back to GH.' My mind was gone." He stayed
in his house, telling Paula that he wanted to quit acting and become a
preacher. "Finally, Shelley got me on the phone and said, 'Listen,
we'll hold your hand. You've got to get out of bed, and you've got to
come to work.' Paula came with me and stayed in the car. I can't
remember when I was ever that scared. I got of the car like this
[shakes]. I just sat with Shelley and she hugged me."
Benard realized that going off lithium was not making him a better
actor; it was keeping him from acting at all. He went back on the drug
and returned to work. "Wendy and Shelley, I owe them a lot," he
praises. "They saved my ass. They could have fired me. You don't have
to put up with somebody saying, 'I'm not coming to work and I'm not
giving you a reason.' When you go through a breakdown, it's tragic.
You're weak, you're fragile, you're vulnerable. You can't act."
Fast-forward three years, and Benard is fine. He has a collection of
award nominations, a beautiful 2-year old daughter, Cailey, and the
unwavering support of a woman who has been to hell and back with
this man. "Paula and I have been through it all," he says softly. "She
is truly amazing. I need to be taken care of. I don't know where I'd be
if I were by myself. I've got an obsessive personality, so I can party
and party. [Without her], I'd be this actor who just thinks about acting
and partying. With Paula, it's great. And of course, Cailey. Got my
kid, my snakes, a nice house, two dogs. It's all balance."
As for his work, Maurice Benard is one of the rare daytime actors who
is completely satisfied with what he has achieved with Sonny Corinthos.
"I'm cool," he smiles. "I'm happy as could be."